Out of the Hurly-Burly; Or, Life in an Odd Corner Read online

  MAX ADELER.

  CONTENTS.

  CHAPTER I. PAGE

  The founder of New Castle--A search for quietness--Life in the city and in the village--Why the latter is preferable--Peculiarities of the village--A sleepy old town--We erect our family altar 25

  CHAPTER II.

  A very dangerous invention--The patent combination step-ladder--Domestic servants--Advertising for a girl--The peasant-girl of fact and fiction--A contrast 36

  CHAPTER III.

  The view upon the river--A magnificent panorama--Mr. and Mrs. Cooley--Matrimonial infelicities--The case of Mrs. Sawyer--A blighted life--A present--Our century plant and its peculiarities 47

  CHAPTER IV.

  Judge Pitman--His experiment in the barn--A lesson in natural history--Catching the early train--One of the miseries of living in the village--Ball's lung exercise--Mr. Cooley's impertinence 56

  CHAPTER V.

  A little love affair--Cowardice of Mr. Parker--Popular interest in amatory matters--The Magruder family--An event in its history--Remarkable experiments by Mrs. Magruder--An indignant husband--A question answered 68

  CHAPTER VI.

  The editor of our daily paper--The appearance and personal characteristics of Colonel Bangs--The affair with the tombstone--Art news--Colonel Bangs in the heat of a political campaign--Peculiar troubles of public singers--The phenomena of menageries--Extraordinary sagacity of the animals--The Wild Man of Afghanistan 84

  CHAPTER VII.

  The Battery and its peculiarities--A lovely scene--Swede and Dutchman two hundred years ago--Old names of the river--Indian names generally--Cooley's boy--His adventure in church--The long and the short of it--Mr. Cooley's dog and our troubles with it 99

  CHAPTER VIII.

  The _Morning Argus_ creates a sensation--A new editor--Mr. Slimmer the poet--An obituary department--Mr. Slimmer on death--Extraordinary scene in the sanctum of Colonel Bangs--Indignant advertisers--The colonel violently assaulted--Observations of the poet--The final catastrophe--Mysterious conduct of Bob Parker--The accident on Magruder's porch--Mrs. Adeler on the subject of obituary poetry in general 113

  CHAPTER IX.

  The reason why I purchased a horse--A peculiar characteristic--Driving by the river--Our horse as a persecutor--He becomes a genuine nightmare--Experimenting with his tail--How our horse died--In relation to pirates--Mrs. Jones's bold corsair--A lamentable tale 134

  CHAPTER X.

  A picturesque church--Some reflections upon church music--Bob Parker in the choir--Our undertaker--A gloomy man--Our experience with the hot-air furnaces--A series of accidents--Mr. Collamer's vocalism--An extraordinary mistake 152

  CHAPTER XI.

  A fishing excursion down the river--Difficulties of the voyage--A series of unfortunate incidents--Our return home, and how we were received--A letter upon the general subject of angling--The sorrows of the fishermen--Lieutenant Smiley--His recollections of Rev. Mr. Blodgett--A very remarkable missionary 164

  CHAPTER XII.

  How the plumber fixed my boiler--A vexatious business--How he didn't come to time, and what the ultimate result was--An accident; and the pathetic story of young Chubb--Reminiscences of General Chubb--The eccentricities of an absent-minded man--The rivals--Parker versus Smiley 183

  CHAPTER XIII.

  An evil day--Flogging-time in New Castle--How the punishment is inflicted--A few remarks upon the general merits of the system--A singular judge--How George Washington Busby was sentenced--Emotions of the prisoner--A cruel infliction, and a code that ought to be reformed 200

  CHAPTER XIV.

  A Delaware legend--A story of the old time--The Christmas play--A cruel accusation--The flight in the darkness along the river shore--The trial and the condemnation--St. Pillory's day seventy years ago--Flogging a woman--The deliverance 211

  CHAPTER XV.

  A very disagreeable predicament--Wild exultation of Parker--He makes an important announcement--An interview with the old man--The embarrassment of Mr. Sparks, and how he overcame it--A story of Bishop Potts--The miseries of too much consolidation--How Potts suffered, and what his end was 237

  CHAPTER XVI.

  Old Fort Kasimir--Two centuries ago--The goblins of the lane--An outrage upon Pitman's cow--The judge discusses the subject of bitters--How Cooley came home--Turning off the gas--A frightful accident in the _Argus_ office--The terrible fate of Archibald Watson--How Mr. Bergner taught Sunday-school 255

  CHAPTER XVII.

  A dismal sort of day--A few able remarks about umbrellas--The umbrella in a humorous aspect--The calamity that befell Colonel Coombs--An ambitious but miserable monarch--The influence of umbrellas on the weather--An improved weather system--A little nonsense--Judge Pitman's views of weather of various kinds 278

  CHAPTER XVIII.

  Trouble for the hero and heroine--A broken engagement and a forlorn damsel--Bob Parker's suffering--A formidable encounter--The peculiar conduct of a dumb animal--Cooley's boy and his home discipline--A story of an echo 293

  CHAPTER XIX.

  A certificate concerning Pitman's hair--Unendurable persecution--A warning to men with bald-headed friends--An explanation--The slanderer discovered--Benjamin P. Gunn--A model life-insurance agent 306

  CHAPTER XX.

  A certain remarkable book--A few suggestions respecting Boston--Delusions of childhood--Bullying General Gage--Judge Pitman and the catechism--An extraordinary blunder--The facts in the case of Hillegass--A false alarm 324

  CHAPTER XXI.

  Settling the business--Vindication of Mr. Bob Parker--A complete reconciliation--The great Cooley inquest--The uncertainty in regard to Thomas Cooley--A phenomenal coroner--The solution of the mystery 334

  CHAPTER XXII.

  An arrival--A present from a Congressman--Meditation upon his purpose--The patent-office report of the future--A plan for revolutionizing public documents and opening a new department in literature--Our trip to Salem--A tragical event--The last of Lieutenant Smiley 350

  CHAPTER XXIII.

  Pitman as a politician--He is nominated for the Legislature--How he was serenaded, and what the result was--I take a hand at politics--The story of my first political speech--My reception at Dover--Misery of a man with only one speech--The scene at the mass meeting--A frightful discomfiture 363

  CHAPTER XXIV.

  The wedding-day--Enormous excitement in the village--Preparations for the event--The conduct of Bob Parker--The ceremony at the church, and the company at Magruder's--A last look at some old friends--Departure of the bride and groom--Some uncommonly solemn reflections, and then--The end 387